Past Midnight.

I don't know if I believe in magic in the sense of rabbits being pulled from hats, but I believe in the mysticism of life. I believe in the power of coincidences and the sharp and potent shock that can come by way of fate. I believe in chances lost and regained. I believe in redemption and the gathering of spirit. I believe in the truth within my heart. I believe in the divinity of nature; that the stars above me sing a brilliant chorus of heaven's song and that I as a witness am truly blessed. 

I believe in love. Fragile, temporal, ethereal love. I believe in the kind of love that transcends. I believe in the kind of love that heals and breaks the walls within us. I believe this love is the greatest thing of all. I believe we are all worthy of this love. 

I believe in silence. I believe that in the quiet places within us, God speaks. I believe His voice is both our heart beating and our soul shining. I believe that God is within all of us. And I believe he transcends all of us. 

I believe in the night. I believe that as we close our eyes when midnight passes before us unseen, we mend the little pieces of us still broken. I believe that we all have cracks that needs mending. I believe we all have the told to mend them. I believe that this life is a miracle and a pain and a tragedy and a beautiful song. And somewhere, voices sing that match our own and we know those voices as our ancestors and descendants. And we part our lips and sing with them, because this life is a cycle and the cycle is both large and small, quick and slow. And we are living in a world of magic. 

Thoughts at 11:13am

Wondering. Dreaming. I'm sighing turbulent clouds of change. They are settling on my shoulders, ruffling my hair. Forcing me to move. I want to. I need to. These feet are not stuck. They are sprinting along a path I'm trying to reach the end of. There's a light there. I can feel it. It's warm and then blazing. My shoulders ache. My soul hurts. I'm free falling and spinning and dancing with the chaos. This is not frightening, but beautiful. I feel free, even as I stumble. I feel graceful even as I trip over my own feet. This life, oh god this life. What is my purpose in it? It's a mystery. Twine and ribbons that I'm unravelling from my body. I'm trying to reach the present within. This present. And I'll keep stripping myself down until I find it. I am unafraid. Unafraid. Unafraid.